by Paolo Di Falco
“Here we talk about the anger between husband and wife. As you know, there have been seven murders in the last seven days. Seven women killed, presumably by seven men. This is just to say the last week. “
Start like this Barbara Palombelli introducing a Forum yesterday’s case in which a woman, Rosa, asked for separation in the famous Rete 4 court for having been subjected to violence and humiliation over the years. So far nothing false, seven have been the women killed in the last week and, since the beginning of the year, well 83 victims of the violence of husbands and ex, victims of an unbridled machismo in which the woman is seen simply as something to be possessed. Victims of a sick system in which who denounces the violence suffered is then left at the mercy of the rapist, at the mercy of his own stalker set free with a simple ban on approach as in the case of the twenty-six year old Vanessa Zappalà killed by her ex on 23 August.
After this premise, however, the presenter continues by saying: “Sometimes, however, it is also legitimate to wonder: these men were completely out of their minds, completely clouded, or there was also a behavior maddening and aggressive on the other side too? It is a question, we must necessarily do it, because we must, especially here, which is a court, examine all the hypotheses ”. And here, faced with these words, one wonders when they will finish criminalize those who have lost their lives whose value is so high that no one can afford to take it away.
Here one wonders, faced with these words so clear that they cannot be justified as the result of a simple misunderstanding, with what courage last month we were moved by the fate of Afghan women who have returned to be buried under a burqa, returned to being incarcerated in a medieval culture in which they cannot work for “security problems”, they cannot wear stiletto heels for “problems of decorum ”and cannot play sports because they could expose parts of their bodies that must be covered instead? Furthermore, we must ask ourselves what it could ever be this “maddening and aggressive behavior” that can make “deserving” death?
One wonders if the Taliban, whom we look upon with so much horror, whom we condemn for the way they treat women, do not in the end hide under our own roof, behind these bitter phrases that from time to time resonate in the our society, from a “television court” or from a provincial bar, and which give us an idea of how deeply rooted it is this macho culture, also endorsed by a large slice of the fairer sex, who too often see women deserving of the violence of others only for the way she dresses, only for her own character in spite of the prayers and saints she shares on her Facebook wall.
It still remains to be asked how that “maddening and aggressive behavior” can somehow justify the 15-year-old’s death. Chiara Gualzetti, stabbed to death by her friend last June 27 only because she fell in love with him, killed by a murderer who, after having stabbed her and kicked her body, marveling at “how resistant the human body was”, justified himself by saying : “I chose her because she was always on me. It bothered me. I couldn’t stand it anymore. I was tired ”. Would this be the “exasperating behavior” capable of justifying Chiara’s death?
This would always be the justification for the killing of the 25-year-old Nigerian Blessing Hours whose lifeless body was found last May 12 in the field of Mazzo di Rho where she prostituted herself? Girl who had left her ex tired of her morbid jealousy, ex who took her life by strangling her with a pink elastic ribbon tied twice around her neck and wig made of braids. And it is still “that maddening behavior” the cause of the child’s death Sharon Barni 18-month-old beaten, raped and killed by her mother’s partner, Gabriel Robert Marincat, who, after taking the life of a little girl, justified himself by saying “to be nervous”?
Dearest Barbara Colombelli, Sharon was the first victim of femicide which opened this 2021 followed, unfortunately, by Victoria, Roberta, Teodora, Sonia, Ilenia, Piera, Luljeta, Lidia, Clara, Deborah, Rossella, Edith, Ornella, Darina, Elena, Tina, Annamaria, Saman, Silvia, Emma, Ylenia, Angela, Tunde, Maria, Perera, Bruna, Alessandra, Sharon, Silvia, Chiara, Ginetta, Vincenza, Lorenza, Marylin, Silvia, Shegushe, Catherine, Vanessa, Ada, Angelica, Rita, Giuseppina and Sonia.
Dearest Barbara, those women mentioned above were not killed for “maddening and aggressive behavior” but they died at the hands of murderers, they died because of the aggression of their comrades, their friends and we can no longer allow them to be killed for a second time from such claims as yours, not even within a “court”.